Unreleased Session Songs


Old Tige

An old Jim Reeves song, lovingly covered until about halfway through…


Mars Ultras, You'll Never Make The Station

Ultras Fanatical, nationalistic, violent football fans of Real Madrid, and possibly others.
Dave Stewart That bloke from the Eurythmics/Tourists. Numerous side projects. Ex of Annie Lennox.
George O'Dowd = Boy George.
Redcar North-Eastern (Teeside) town. Has a racetrack (for horses).
Grundy Reference to Solomon Grundy, born on a Monday, etc etc. Could well be hinting at Bill Grundy as well (the bloke who "interviewed" the Pistols on Granada TV with much provocation).
Richard & Judy ITV's (now ex-) morning couple. Awful. He's a bit light-fingered (allegedly).
Deacon Blue Scottish popsters, the girl from whom does very little apart from a few backing vocals. Oh, and she is/was shagging the singer.
Sinitta Stock, Aitken and Waterman protegee. Tripe.
St Peter God's mate. That bloke at the gates of heaven.

The lyrics are here.


Goodnight Irene

The Leadbelly song beloved of Bristol Rovers fans. Apparently Nigel was so impressed with the Gasheads' "performance" when Tranmere played Rovers in the Leyland DAF Cup, that he decided to record it in a Peel session as a tribute! The original (Gashead) words are here, together with HMHB's version. UPDATE: Rovers used to have a site especially for 'Irene', complete with (short) audio sample of the original, but it's now gone...


Mr Cave's A Window Cleaner Now

A parody of Big Jesus Trash Can by The Birthday Party, the Antipodean's previous bunch. The title is taken from George Formby's Mr Wu's A Window Cleaner Now
"Release the pigeons!" Top line in the song; was "Release the bats!" from BP (different song!)
"Big Jesus soul makes gas mask" A fine ending. There's a future for you in tortured soul circles, Nigel (to paraphrase Peelie). The lyrics are here.


There Stands The Glass

Written by Russ Hull, Mary Jean Shurtz and Audrey Grisham, recorded by many, Webb Pierce seemingly being the most well-known. Lyrics here.


Song To The Siren

Tim Buckley song, also covered by This Mortal Coil.


King Of Rome

A song by David Sudbury; it came 4th in a national songwriting competition in the late 80's, and was picked up and recorded by June Tabor.


I'm Throwing Rice (At The Girl That I Love)

By Eddie Arnold from 1949.


Epiphany

I'll fill in some details at some point...



Unreleased Live Songs

OK, I've said this wasn't a lyrics page, but I'll make an exception for the unreleased stuff, since a few of you may not have heard them…

Mars Ultras, You'll Never Make The Station (1992)

Quick, run, hide, here comes Dave Stewart,
Walking up the drive, with that look in his eye,
That "Let's do a project" look, "about third-rate Swiss agit-pop"

George O'Dowd, so glad you're happy, all fit and well,
After going through the hell of being a popstar, street parties in Redcar.
Oh Mr Woo, what shall I do ?
Surrogate Grundy, sold on a Monday, to Richard and Judy

Drill

I am the girl from Deacon Blue, doo doo doo doo doo doo doo doo
Multi-talented Sinitta, I just want to meet yer
Cos I am St Peter, and you're going downstairs
Along with cars that have pet names


Goodnight Irene

Here are two versions of "Irene", good for singing at people in pubs near closing time. Ta to Konrad for the Gashead version. I thinks that some local dialect has corrupted some of the lyrics of this (I lives, I loves, etc.); however, I believe it should read 'gert notion'.

Goodnight Irene (Gashead version)

I asked your mother for you,
She told me that you was too young,
I wish dear Lord never have seen your face,
I'm sorry that you ever been born.

CHORUS:
Irene Goodnight Irene,
Irene Goodnight,
Goodnight Irene, Goodnight Irene,
I'll see you in my dreams

Sometimes I live in the country,
Sometimes I lives in town,
Sometimes I have a great notion,
To jump in the river and drown.
[repeat chorus]

I loves Irene, God knows I do,
Loves her till the sea runs dry,
If Irene turns her back on me,
I'm gonna take morphine and die.
[repeat chorus]

Last Saturday night I got married
Me and my wife settled down, (IN BED)
Now me and my wife have parted
I'll take a little stroll down town
[repeat chorus]

Stop your gamblin', Stop your ramblin'
Stop staying out late at night
Go-oo home to your wife and family
And stay by your fireside bright
[repeat chorus ad infinitum]

Goodnight Irene (HMHB version)

Sometimes I live in the country,
Sometimes I live in town,
Sometimes I have a great notion,
To jump in the river and drown.

CHORUS:
Irene Goodnight Irene,
Irene Goodnight,
Goodnight Irene, Goodnight Irene,
I'll see you in my dreams

Sometimes there's a change in the ocean,
Sometimes there's a change in the sea,
Sometimes there's a change in my one true love,
But never, no change in me.

[repeat chorus]

From every danger a haven,
From every tempest a still,
If you are gone when the morning comes,
I'll meet you in the house on the hill.

I love Irene, God knows I do,
I Love her till the river runs dry,
If ere Irene should leave me Lord
I'll take morphine and I'll die.

[repeat chorus to end]


Lakeland Fell Walk (1993)

I saw Dutch veterans Alquin fooling around
On pleasure craft at Chester, no word of a lie
I heard our pilot_______________
__________________________________
I though he must have been on drugs
And he was, and he was, and he was, and he was

Walking up Scafell swinging a chain
Along comes a Wainwright fan, I asked him his name
When he said he was Malcolm of Aramathea
I said "I hope you die soon
Get off you cabaret twat"
And he did, and he did, and he did, and he did
Strangely enough

Why is it when there's bobsleigh on the television
Everyone says "I love to have a go at that"

My trouble's all behind me
I got you by my side
Sunshine is up above me
Sport Billy's on next!
Your original Breton shirt's in the bin
Stromsgodset under fives have found an offy to do
Over there, over there, over there, over there
And do they smell..like...


It's a Clear Day (But I Can't See the Point) (1993)

It's a clear day, but I can't see the point
And anyway, I'm a bit Rachel Heyhoe

It doesn't have to be a clear day to see right through you
It doesn't have to be a clear day to see right through you
It doesn't matter what you say, I'm not going to go through
The Armoury Show's entire back catalogue with you

[recorder duet]

I am the nice man, who lives in the unassuming bungalow
At the end of my unassuming days
I've got three wrong 'uns
With varying degrees of detectability

It doesn't have to be a clear day to see right through you
It doesn't have to be a clear day to see right through you
It doesn't matter what you say, I'm not going to go through
The Armoury Show's entire back catalogue with you

[another recorder duet]


13 Eurogoths Floating In The Dead Sea (1993)

Alien babies with almond-shaped eyes
Crawling round pub gardens, but nobody minds
Had the loft converted back into a loft
Like the front of an Anglia, you look surprised

13 Eurogoths floating in the Dead Sea

Wearing leopardskin lipstick and carrying a flask
She follows Alvin Schockemohle where'er he roams
We stand in our bus queues, and we die in midweek
You feel a dead good sneeze coming, and then it goes away

13 Eurogoths floating in the Dead Sea

See my free binder
Do you like my free binder?
I got it with my cider...and BLACK

13 Eurogoths floating in the Dead Sea


The Price Of Fish Remains The Same (1993)

Come hear about the things I've done today
In a carefully nurtured, tortured kind of way
Invite the journalists
Onto the tourbus

All I have to do is pull this face
Then everything starts falling into place
Is the blind cough (?)
To get your kecks off?

And then I drink drink drink drink drink drink drink
'Til I feel as if I'm suitably wrecked
And then I think think think think think think think
It's easy being the genius elect

[guitar break]

Then all my songs begin to sound no good
Then I'll just claim that I'm misunderstood
I brought the baby
It's changed me life mate

And then I drink drink drink drink drink drink drink
'Til I feel as if I'm suitably wrecked
And then I think think think think think think think
It's easy being the genius elect

Lord behold
Lord behold

And the price of fish remains the same...


Mr Cave's a Window Cleaner Now (1995)

Oh, gangway! I'm coming through! Hey hey hey...

If there's one thing that I like, I drive around on my motorbike
I am the speed king. I am the speed king.

Oh, release the pigeons! Oh, mother! Hey hey hey...

Oh no, it touched me!

It's turned out nice again!

Oh, I've got a picture of a girl next door
With my little stick of Ayers Rock
And I heard her laughing,
And I heard her screaming,
And I found her bleeding,
And she wasn't breathing,
So I did what I did with my gas mask.

Oh, if you could see what I could see.

Big Jesus soul makes gas mask!



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